Pittsburgh

If you’ve been hanging around here for a while, you probably know that I am madly in love with a little show called Listen to Your Mother. During the 2014 season, I was thrilled to be a part of the Washington DC cast and share my story “Emergency Mom” with the world. Did you miss it? Oh wait, here it is again:

After being a part of Listen to Your Mother, I knew that such a powerful and meaningful show needed to be brought to my hometown of Pittsburgh. Even though I haven’t lived there in over ten years, I still identify Pittsburgh as my home and love and adore everything that fabulous city has to offer.

When my blogging buddies Jennifer, Stephanie and I got the word we were going to bring Listen to Your Mother to the ‘Burgh we all did a ridiculous happy dance, cried a little, and then rolled up our sleeves because we were ready to work!

So where does this journey start? First up, auditions!

We are opening up spots for auditions, and if you live in the Pittsburgh or surrounding areas (WV,MD, OH), we want YOU to tell your story!

Listen to Your Mother is searching for men and women to share their stories about motherhood. You don’t have to be a mother, just have a story about motherhood. Even if you aren’t a professional writer or have any stage experience, don’t worry! Most cast members are in the same boat. Pieces are around 5 minutes long and read, not memorized. So don’t worry! It’s nothing like the stressful days of high school giving presentations in front of the class.

We are looking for stories that make us laugh and cry. We want stories of the good, the bad, the really bad, and the magical parts of motherhood. We want to hear about your mother, why you became a mother, why you never want to be a mother, who is the mother figure in your life. We want to hear it all so that we can give a broad perspective of motherhood that can be woven into one phenomenon show. We want your stories and we want to give you a microphone.

Click here is all the info you need for auditions in Pittsburgh!

Not near Pittsburgh? No worries, check here to see if there is a show near you! Each city has a different audition process and time frame so check the site to get all the details.

Even if being a part of the cast doesn’t sound like something you would want to do, can you do me a huge favor? Share this with someone you think would be interested in Listen to Your Mother! With shows in 39 cities, you are bound to introduce this life changing show to someone new! Then find a show near you and grab all your girlfriends and go see the show! Believe me, you won’t be sorry!

Roll call, roll call! Let’s all scream as we introduce our team. Let’s multi-task, shall we? Since today is my birthday and there are so many new readers thanks to Scary Mommy, let’s get better acquainted. These questions came to me from the crazy funny Stephanie from When Crazy Meets Exhaustion and they came to her from the hysterical Marcia from Menopausal Mother. Here we go!

1. WHERE WERE YOU BORN?

An itty-bitty town outside of Pittsburgh, PA. Tina Fey clearly used this town as her inspiration for Mean Girls. Sadly, I was a total Gretchen Wieners without the whole “My dad invented Toaster Strudel.”

2. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER SOMEONE?

My older brother napped during Guiding Light, so that was the only show my mom watched. There was a character named Amanda. Eventually she went crazy and ended up in an insane asylum, but my mom thought it was such a beautiful and different name. Guess everyone else did too because it was the #1 name the year I was born. Not too original there, Mom.

3. IF YOU HAVE CHILDREN, HOW MANY DO YOU HAVE?

Two kiddos- Monkey and Mimi. Here are they are with bed head but sharing the iPad. Sharing is caring.

4. HOW MANY PETS DO YOU HAVE?

One dog- Suggie, the original baby. Here is a picture of her trying to eat a cookie in my bag, but she almost hung herself in the process. I get it, Suggie. I feel the same way about cookies

5. YOUR WORST INJURY?

Well the whole birth thing wasn’t a walk in the park. You know, the part of pushing a kid out of your va-jay-jay. Other than that, I would say falling off a bar (graceful) while in Cancun on spring break and breaking my foot was pretty nasty. I had to hobble around on a broken foot for a week in another country #survivor

6. DO YOU HAVE A SPECIAL TALENT?

Besides making beautiful children? Lame TV trivia that was useless until a few weeks ago when I wrote a blog about life lessons in 90210. Jason Priestly retweeted it and it was on Scary Mommy!—Welcome to the big leagues, folks!

7. WHAT’S YOUR FAVORITE THING TO BAKE?

My great aunt’s fudge recipes. Not going to lie, they are a little bite of heaven.

8. FAVORITE FAST FOOD?

Any and all! Just gave it up for Lent because I was stopping for fries a little too often lately.

9. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP?

Pre-kids, yes. Post kids, HELL NO! I can barely get on a roller coaster without updating my will and fearing my husband will remarry some evil step-mother that will be raising my kids

10. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE?

If they are wearing the mom uniform—yoga pants, ponytail, someone else’s food on their shirt, stickers on their butt.

11. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED?

Honey, I cry every day. I am an emotional basket case. I cry when I am happy, sad, angry, frustrated. If there is an emotion, I am usually crying.

12. ANY CURRENT WORRIES?

Non-stop—my kids, hubby, parents, selling our house, finding a house, will I need Botox this year…

13. NAME 3 DRINKS THAT YOU DRINK REGULARLY:

Coffee. Wine. Diet Coke- the Holy Trinity

14. WHAT’S YOUR FAVORITE BOOK?

Not going to lie, I love Mommy Porn. If you need some smutty titles, come see me. I’m like the romance drug dealer around these parts. No one wants to talk about it, but they come to me for the good stuff.

15. WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE A PIRATE?

Is Johnny Depp on my boat? If so, yes. Otherwise, I’ll pass

16. FAVORITE SMELLS?

The beach, my kids heads, my husband’s shirts—the clean ones, not the ones he has worn all day—gross

17. WHY DO YOU BLOG?

I am crap at keeping scrapbooks and baby books and sometimes I am funny—Questionable Choices in Parenting was born!

18. WHAT SONG DO YOU WANT PLAYED AT YOUR FUNERAL?

Lots of show tunes to liven up the joint. Like A Chorus Line’s “One, Singular Sensation.”

19. WHAT IS YOUR LEAST FAVORITE THING ABOUT YOURSELF?

Staying in touch with my friends and family. However, a million different types of social media have helped. If I like your status on Facebook, it should be the equivalent to me calling you and saying “hi.”

20. FAVORITE HOBBY?

Reading smutty books—you know want to read them too. Everyone is doing it. You know where to find me…

21. WHAT DO YOU LOOK FOR IN A FRIEND?

Sarcasm, an appreciation for Howard Stern, and a love of wine

22. NAME SOMETHING YOU’VE DONE THAT YOU NEVER THOUGHT YOU’D DO:

Here’s the thing, I am pretty ballsy with a few cocktails, so I would go out on a limb and say I have done a lot that would shock people; however, my Dad and Mom read my blog religiously and I already got some flack for talking about shaving my girly parts. So let’s just walk away from this one, shall we?

23. FAVORITE FUN THINGS TO DO?

Beach, beach, beach with my kids, and beach.

24. ANY PET PEEVES?

People who have political rants on Facebook. Seriously, shut up. If you are so fired up all the time, go run for office or make that move to another country. Go back to posting your lunch and pictures of your kids.

25. WHAT’S THE LAST THING THAT MADE YOU LAUGH?

I found this gem on Pinterest and was laughing so hard my husband left the room:

http://www.buzzfeed.com/mjs538/funniest-youtube-comments-of-the-year

And this HILARIOUS post by Kerri from HouseTalkN. I may have peed myself with #9.

http://www.scarymommy.com/when-assholes-criticize-public-breastfeeding/

So there you go, 25 burning questions answered about me! Make me a happy girl and take a one of the questions and answer it on my comments or on my Facebook page, OK? Remember, sharing is caring!

Are you ready to Listen to Your Mother?

Meet and Greet