*Hangs head in shame* Friends, I committed the cardinal sin of parenting: I bragged on social media about my “super healthy kids” and BOOM every freaking cold, cough, flu, and virus within 20 miles hit our house for MONTHS. Ugh, waiting for the health department to drop a bubble on this house any minute. Silver lining, the Today Show Show (yes the Today Show!!!) is featuring my Life Hacks for Keeping Your Sanity When Your Kids Are Sick! So please do me a solid and hop on over to read it and click the vote button. I promise I won’t cough on you! Click Right Here to read and vote!
It’s Here! I STILL Just Want To Pee Alone!
My blog’s tag line “Laughing at life as a parent so they don’t commit me” isn’t just something funny that fits nicely on my blog. No, friends, it the TRUTH! And really, we all need to laugh a whole lot more, amirite? So let me help you with that because I’m thrilled to tell you that the hilarious book I STILL Just Want to Pee Alone is available now and I’m in it!! My essay is all about kids in public bathrooms, poop particles, and Dr. Oz. It’s getting real, friends.
So it’s time to ignore your kids, tell your husband to fend for himself, get your copy, and get your laugh on! Remember when I told you about the 40 amazing writers that are featured in this book? What are you waiting for? Go! Read! Laugh! Leave a review on Amazon! See how I snuck that in there?
Get your copy on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, ans iTunes or you can get the book from me! Just send me an email to questionablechoicesinparenting@gmail.com
Also I’m having a book signing April 10 at the Simply Sweet Shoppe in Uniontown, PA and I’ll be speaking at the Uniontown Baby & Beyond Expo on May 17. If you are in the area, please come see me! I will probably hug you. Hope you’re cool with hugs.
New Here? Come for a tour!
Well hey there, friend! Are you new around here? Did you wander on over after seeing my TLCme Life Hacks webseries or catch one of my TV appearances? Great, I like you already! We love new people over here at Questionable Choices in Parenting. Let me give you a quick tour.
I’m Amanda: Candy Land loser, yoga pants enthusiast, a mom of three, Life Hacks Expert, a Lifestyle/Mom/Family writer and personality. You’ll find a lot of my life hacks and parenting tips posts here or over at my other site AmandaMushro.com. You can see some of my TV appearances here!
Something important to note: I’m all about fun. Even if that means turning myself into a turkey for morning TV!
So stop and stay awhile! Check out my TLC webseries or check the Can You Hack Motherhood tab for my very best life hacks. If you want to giggle, click on the Laughs tab and check out some of my funniest posts. If you want something a little more heart warming, check out the Family tab.
If you like what you see, subscribe to my blog (just add your email address over there on the left), or find me on Twitter, Facebook, Google+, Pinterest, or Instagram
Yes, I’m the Mom Crying at Kindergarten Orientation
I already know that I wear my heart on my sleeve; I just wasn’t aware that I also wear every single emotion on my face too.
“How are you doing?” seems like a simple pleasantry between two people. But this was a loaded “How are you doing?” and not in the Joey from Friends “How you doin’?” kinda way, but in a “Are you OK?”
In the fall, my boy will be headed off to kindergarten and today I’m at kindergarten orientation registering him as a new student. I thought I had my emotions in check, but I caught the eye of the principal mere moments of entering the school.
“How are you doing?” she cautiously asked.
“Me? I’m……..”
I consider giving the polite answer of “I’m fine, wonderful, excited, thrilled!” but in that moment, when she and I are eye to eye, I know she’s on to me.
“I’m…” I continue, “I’m going to try to keep it together today.”
“But they haven’t even gotten to school yet! You’ll be fine.”
In my attempts to hold back a sob, I answered with a too forced “Sure.”
So what was it that gave me away, Mrs. Principal?
Was it my eyes? Did they defy me with the telltale signs that I was crying in the shower this morning?
Could you sense that I had been punched in the stomach when I pulled up to your lovely little school?
Could you see on my face that even though I’m standing in a school that parents and students love, that is surrounded by a neighborhood that people flock to simply to attend your school, a school that has artwork and student achievements wallpapering the walls, that I’m searching hard to find something I don’t like.
Could you sense the dull pain in my chest? The pain from realizing that in a few short months I will be putting my heart on a big, yellow bus and I’ll wave and wave until I can’t see him and just like that, he’s off to school.
Let me assure you, Mrs. Principal that my boy, he will be fine. He will walk the halls of your big school and he will show everyone how smart, kind, funny and sweet he is. He’s so sweet he’ll rot your teeth and he’s so funny, he’ll make every teacher laugh. He’ll make friends and he’ll be JUST FINE, more than fine. So really all of this, this face I must be carrying today, it’s really about me.
It’s about me all excited and wistful and scared all in one at kindergarten orientation. It’s me chiding myself for being so emotional and knowing my Mom friends will have a field day with me when I recount this ridiculous interaction between you and me.
But I just can’t help it and apparently, can’t hide it either. So I will watch your presentation, be befuddled by the carpool, nod quietly when you show us the playground, and try my best to not make an audible sounds of distaste when I see the “kindergarten hall”
Because, after all, Mrs. Principal, in a few months you and I will see each other in the hallways for parties and PTA meetings, and I can assure you I won’t be crying then. And maybe in a few years, when I make this kindergarten orientation trip for my daughter, I won’t be crying. Probably, I will probably be crying.
So you and I might be right back here, and you can assure me it will all be OK and I’ll believe you.
Our New Favorite Early Reading Apps for Android
While this is a sponsored post, all opinions are 100% my own #MoreVA #VZWBuzz
I’m sure I’m not alone when I say that I have NO idea how parents entertained their kids before the creation of smartphones. I’m not just talking about mindless games that do nothing for their little brains, but the educational apps that keep their attention, keep them learning, and keep them happy. Both of my kids are very tactile learners, so interactive apps really appeal to them. Since my son is headed off to kindergarten (sob!) in the fall, we’ve moved past basic letter and sound recognition games and now we are on to early reading games. Here are some of our favorite early reader games that the kids have been playing on my Android Turbo!
Endless Reader– Around here, Endless Alphabet is a favorite app, so we were excited to move onto Endless Reader. In this app, kids are introduced to “sight words.” These are the most commonly found words in early reading, and learning these words are key to reading success. In this app, the words are shown in context and the kids have a blast with all of the silly sounds as they see the words, hear the words, and manipulate the words in puzzles.
Kids Learn to Read– I really like apps that have a variety of games within the app so my kids are challenged, not easily bored, and willing to come back to the app again and again. Kids Learn to Read does all of this with letter sounds, making their own words, and matching games. Tommy Turtle is the star of this fun app that focuses on hearing and seeing how letter sounds blend together to make early reading words.
Super Why Phonics Fair- Based on the hit PBS show Super Why, kids go on a adventure with the Super Why gang as they focus on phonics through interactive games. My kids really love the stickers they earn during each level and I love that the advanced levels for more challenging games.
I Story Books– There is nothing I love more than snuggling up next to my kids and reading books. With I Story Books you can read to your child or they can listen to a narrator read a number of fairy tales and classic stories full of colorful illustrations. There are different versions of this app so you can find the types of books that appeal to your kids the most. New books are added every two weeks, and both of my kids are really loving the classics and the science themed books.
Sight Words Kindergarten– This app is great for early readers and readers struggling to learn and recall sight words. Through six interactive games, kids are shown small groupings of words so through repetition and memory. As they start mastering the words, the word groupings get larger to become more challenging.
Playing games on your smart phone and tablet isn’t just for kids! Join @theonlinemom @RobynsWorld @geekbabe and @thetechdad on Friday, March 13 at 12 noon PT (3 pm ET) as we chat about Smartphone and Tablet Games!
When: Friday, March 13, 2015
3:00-4:00 pm ET
12:00-1:00 pm PT
‘Smartphone and Tablet Games’
Join @theonlinemom @RobynsWorld @geekbabe and @thetechdad on Friday, March 13 at 12 noon PT (3 pm ET) as we chat about
Smartphone and Tablet Games!
RSVP and attend the party for a chance to win a MOGA Pro Power Controller or a Droid Turbo smartphone!
Join @TheOnlineMom on the Video Recap right after the chat for another chance to win a prize!
To RSVP:
- Email RSVP@theonlinemom.com(subject line: VZWBuzz) and include your Twitter ID.
- Spread the word and RT this link on your Twitter feed: http://ow.ly/ImCn5
- Join us on TweetDeck or HootSuite (#VZWBuzz) on Friday, March 13 between 3 – 4 pm ET
- Tell your Twitter followers!
PRIZE WINNERS will be announced during the Party!
A NOTE to my nTelos Readers:
If you are using nTelos as your wireless provider, Verizon has a special offer going on right now just for you! Switch to Verizon Wireless and get a $150.00 credit plus free activation per smartphone when you bring your number to Verizon. How awesome is that? We have been Verizon Customers for years, and compared to other companies, Verizon is faster and more reliable. Always! Check out this Verizon Wireless Deal today.
I STILL Just Want to Pee Alone. How About You?
The other day I tried a really novel idea–I LOCKED the bathroom door. Crazy, I know, but we have these locks on the doors and apparently they do stuff like keep kids, dogs, and husbands out of the bathroom while it’s otherwise occupied. Fascinating!
It was about 30 seconds after lock implementation that I realized why those locks aren’t used by mothers very often. It might have been the banging on the door. Or the cries of “Mommy, something is wrong with this door. I can’t get it.” Or the sudden crash that came from the toy room that sent me running with yoga pants around my ankles.
While I may never pee alone again, I seem to be in good company, and I’m beyond thrilled to revel the cover of the new book that I’m going to be in I Still Just Want to Pee Alone. It’s available March 27, 2015!
This book is a sequel to the wildly successful book created by the hilarious Jen Mann of People I Want to Punch in the Throat. You’ll find essays about motherhood being the toughest and most absurd and hilarious job, and we can all relate to our deep desire to just PEE ALONE! If you were a fan of the first one, you are going to LOVE this book. Here’s the line up of fantastic writers in I Still Just Want to Pee Alone:
Bethany Kriger Thies of Bad Parenting Moments
Kim Bongiorno of Let Me Start By Saying
Alyson Herzig of The Shitastrophy
JD Bailey of Honest Mom
Kathryn Leehane of Foxy Wine Pocket
Suzanne Fleet of Toulouse and Tonic
Nicole Leigh Shaw of Nicole Leigh Shaw, Tyop Aretist
Meredith Spidel of The Mom of the Year
Rebecca Gallagher of Frugalista Blog
Rita Templeton of Fighting off Frumpy
Darcy Perdu of So Then Stories
Christine Burke of Keeper of The Fruit Loops
Amy Flory of Funny Is Family
Robyn Welling of Hollow Tree Ventures
Sarah del Rio of est. 1975
Amanda Mushro of Questionable Choices in Parenting
Jennifer Hicks of Real Life Parenting
Courtney Fitzgerald of Our Small Moments
Lola Lolita of Sammiches and Psych Meds
Victoria Fedden of Wide Lawns and Narrow Minds
Keesha Beckford of Mom’s New Stage
Stacia Ellermeier of Dried-on Milk
Ashley Allen of Big Top Family
Meredith Bland of Pile of Babies
Harmony Hobbs of Modern Mommy Madness
Janel Mills of 649.133: Girls, the Care and Maintenance Of
Kim Forde of The Fordeville Diaries
Stacey Gill of One Funny Motha
Beth Caldwell of The Cult of Perfect Motherhood
Sarah Cottrell of Housewife Plus
Michelle Back of Mommy Back Talk
Tracy Sano of Tracy on the Rocks
Linda Roy of elleroy was here
Michelle Poston Combs of Rubber Shoes In Hell
Susan Lee Maccarelli of Pecked To Death By Chickens
Vicki Lesage of Life, Love, and Sarcasm in Paris
Kris Amels of Why, Mommy?
Mackenzie Cheeseman of Is there cheese in it?
Tracy DeBlois of Orange & Silver
So on March 27, get the book, use those fancy locks, tell everyone you have “business” to attend to, and get ready to laugh out loud with everyone reading this book!
Moving Up A Box
I really love every part of my birthday. I love cake. I love being the center of attention for an entire day. I love using my birthday as an excuse to get out of things:
“Sorry, I can’t do laundry. It’s my birthday”
“Sorry, I can’t cook today. It’s my birthday.”
“Sorry, I can only eat cake All. Day. Long. It’s my birthday”
While I’ve never been one to get hung up on age, this particular birthday has given me reason to take pause and all because of a little box.
The other day I was filling out an application for something– I cannot remember what the application was for because momnesia, it’s real and it’s wicked– and when I went to “check the box for your age,” I paused because I realized, I was moving up a box! Normally I fall into 30-34 or the 27-34 box, but now I’m moving on up to the 35-40 box. Yikes! How did that happen?Really, at what point did my box officially become “mid-thirties” and closer to 40 than 25? 35, huh?
Really, I usually have no hangups about getting older, mainly because I’m too busy, frazzled, and exhausted to really contemplate age, but I was definitely taken aback. And to be honest, I don’t really know why.
So instead of feeling down in the dumps and being an emotional eater all day today, I’m going to think of all the awesome shit people did when they were 35. Like this:
- Julia Child started cooking at age 35
- Evelyn Ashford won her final Olympic gold medal at age 35
- Frederic William Herschel, an English astronomer, invented contact lens.
- Mozart stopped composing because he died (Wait, that’s a horrible example!)
Maybe all of these accomplishments will inspire me to simply eat all the cake out of joy and anticipation of what this year of life has in store for me– I already have a few fabulous things brewing personally and professionally, and did I mention I’m eating cake all day?
So this new box, it ain’t no thing because much like a fine wine, I get better with age. Which is ridiculous because I only drink cheap wine, but I digress.
So 35, let’s do this!
The Today Show and my 50 Shades of Excitement
I always thought my first appearance on the Today Show would be about parenting and some of the ridiculous essays I write about my epic parenting fails, but the way I landed myself on the Today Show is actually pretty perfect for this lady!
When you’re an English teacher people often assume that you spend your free time reading the classics and analyzing great pieces of literature. I mean, my brother is an ER doctor and no one assumes for a good time he breaks his own arm then sets it in a cast. So when you catch a glimpse of what’s on my Kindle, don’t be surprised that you won’t find any Dickens or a single Shakespeare play. What you will find is the same trilogy that millions of ladies have been downloading, trading, discussing, whispering, shouting, and patiently waiting for the move version, 50 Shades of Grey.
I assumed I’d be catching Mr. Grey in all his glory on the big screen with a few of my gal pals, but a producer from The Today Show called and because I sent them a silly caption from one of the movie stills, they asked if I would fly to NYC for their special screening and ask the stars of the film a few questions. I tried to act really cool on the phone (take deep breaths) but I’m sure my inner “SQUEEEEEEEEEE!” was showing!
“Oh sure, that sounds fun. I could do that.” SQUEEEEEE!!!!
Here is how I got ready for my trip:
1. Call up your best gal pal and scream into the phone “I’m going to be on the Today Show! Get a babysitter because we are flying to NYC to see 50 Shades of Grey!” Wait for her confusion then her screams of joy.
2. Get your mom to watch your kids. Assure her the NEXT time you are on the Today Show you will take her.
3.Shop for something fabulous to wear and shop fast.
4. Get your nails and hair did.
5. Be prepared to feel like a celebrity for two days. Understand reality will come crashing down, but not yet!
Obviously having a car pick us up at the airport totally did NOT go to my head–whatever, it was pretty rad—
I’d like to thank my kids for getting up insanely early every morning. Because of them, I was actually able to get myself up, ready and down to the car that would take us to the event at 5:30 in the morning. Since I was a guest of the Today Show, we walked right in, but hundreds and hundreds of ladies were waiting outside in the frigid 10 degree weather to get inside. Insane!
On the “grey carpet” were lines and lines of fellas handing out yummy drinks. If THIS is the kind of stuff that happens at red carpet events, count me in, friends.
It’s always key to take your super fabulous friend who adores NYC just as much as you do and appreciates and practices going a little bananas for celebrities much like myself. I heart her. Funny thing about the audience, they were all women. The only men were the ones working for the Today Show.
The day before I planned everything I would say to the author E.L. James. Then I met her and said something stupid like “I’m so excited!” Good one, Amanda. Definitely one she will remember.
Then there were ear-piercing screams from the back of the theater. No need to panic.Mr. Grey just entered the building. After the first set of interviews with the stars of the film and the writer, the movie started (again so awkward to watch this movie at 7:30 in the morning) and we all settled in for the movie we’ve been anticipating!
Check out my vlog where I’m giving my honest review of the film!
After the movie wrapped up, all of the cameras and lights were back on and it was my turn to be on camera and ask the stars a few questions!
Knowing my entire family was at home with the DVR set, I made sure I didn’t have lipstick on my teeth, walked up next to Carson Daily and…. they ran out of time.
So I didn’t get to ask my question, but I did get on camera much to the happiness of my mother who will tell everyone this story for the rest of her life.
Natalie Morales was so sweet and apologized for running out of time for our segment, grabbed my hand, and said “let’s get some pictures with Jamie and Dakota.” And that, friends, is how Natalie because my favorite person forever.
The entire time I was in New York I kept saying “This is so absurd. All of it. It’s so absurd.” Fantastic and absurd but totally amazing. See, your English teachers were right, reading DOES open all kinds of doors.
5 Apps to Help You Update Your Wardrobe
While this is a sponsored post, all opinions are 100% my own #MoreVA #VZWBuzz
Friends, I’m making a change. A BIG change and I’m starting with my sad, sorry wardrobe. I used to consider myself very fashionable and I had a closet full of stylish clothes to prove it. But now that I’m a write-from-home-mom, the contents of my wardrobe range from yoga pants to clothes that could possibly be pajamas. When I was packing for a trip last week, I yelled from the depths of my closet “I have NOTHING to wear,” and this time I really, really meant it. So I’m rectifying this problem by adding some new essentials to my closet. But I don’t have hours and hours to walk into every shop at the mall so I’m using a few new apps I’ve added to my brand new Android Turbo to make life a little easier and a little more fashionable.
Are you a fan of Pinterest? Me too, but usually I’m looking for yummy recipes and fun crafts for my kids on this amazing site. But did you know that there are thousands of pins that showcase fabulous outfits? Thank you, stylish Pinners! Since I don’t know what my style is anymore and I need help putting an entire outfit together from top to bottom, and Pinterest is my starting place. I search the pins for styles that I like and then I have an idea what is actually “in” these days.
Were you a fan of the movie Clueless? As if! Did you dream that someday you would have a closet that would rotate racks and racks of fantastic clothes and you’d use a computer program to create your outfits just like Cher? While I can’t help you with the rotating racks, My Dressing app can help you create outfits based on the pieces in your closet and it’s ridiculously fun. Once I started buying a few new pieces for my wardrobe and cleaned out the clothes that could make me a fashion victim, I used My Dressing app to take pictures and mix and match new outfits. I’m a visual person and I have momnesia so I LOVE seeing all my outfits together.
Now that I have a few ideas of what clothes and accessories I want to buy, it’s time to head out to the stores, but not before I clip some coupons…kidding. I have zero time to clip coupons so I needed an app that could do that for me. Retail Me Not has thousands of coupons from thousands of stores and it’s more than just clothes! Get this app and get your shopping and saving on!
Getting out and hitting the stores isn’t always possible for a busy Mamma like me so Fashion Kaleidoscope is a different way to shop. The app shows you a ton of styles and if you like the look or even just one piece of the look, you click on it and are given links to similar clothes and accessories! How cool is that? The app even shows you where you can get the best price for the looks you love.
Adding new clothes to your closet means it’s time to get rid of clothes you aren’t wearing, and why not make some money too? The Vinted app allows you to snap a picture of the clothing you want to sell and shares it with their community of buyers. Clean out that closet and make some money–so you can shop more!
Want to learn more about Mobile Shopping?
Join @theonlinemom @RobynsWorld @geekbabe and @thetechdad on Friday, February 13 at 12 noon PT (3 pm ET) as we chat about Mobile Shopping!
RSVP and attend the party for a chance to win great prizes!
Plus, join the Video Recap right after the chat for another chance to win a prize!
To RSVP:
- Email RSVP@theonlinemom.com(subject line: VZWBuzz) and include your Twitter ID.
- Spread the word and RT this link on your Twitter feed: http://ow.ly/GPzTY
- Join us on TweetDeck or HootSuite (#VZWBuzz) on Friday, February 13 between 12 – 1 pm PT
- Tell your Twitter followers!
PRIZE WINNERS will be announced during the Party!
A NOTE to my nTelos Customers:
If you are using nTelos as your wireless provider, Verizon has a special offer going on right now just for you to switch to Verizon Wireless and get a $150.00 credit. This is a $150 bill credit PER LINE for up to 4 lines so the total savings could be $600.00! We have been Verizon Customers for years and compared to other companies and Verizon is faster and more reliable. Check out this Verizon Wireless Deal today.
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